Ever since I met Rabbit and learned of her accomplishments… well she made me question just how far I should go on this crazy journey I’m on.
Hand to heart when I started I had no intentions of doing any races. None, zero, zip. That was two years and 3 months ago (June 2016).
“You could do that. You can’t do that. You can do that. You can’t do that. You won’t know unless you try.”
18 months I had no intention of ever doing more than maybe a half marathon. I even designed and 3D printed a PR display that only went up to half marathon.
And then I met Rabbit who, as I’ve mentioned before, the first question she asked after we met for the first time in person was did I run or something like after she saw me wearing a pair of Altra Lone Peak 2.5’s as my daily shoes.
Since then we’ve shared stories of runs, opinions of running, gear and training. In spite of our 1500 miles of distance apart we’ve even run together albeit in a virtual race.
Somewhere in there after I made her acquaintance, I find myself signed up, cash paid and travel plans made for not only a 50K in 10 weeks (OMG) but a 50Mile in 5 months (OMFG).
For those of you for whom these are mere training run distances now, do think back and remember a time when you weren’t quite as awesome as you are now and what you went through to get to where you are now.
And now I’m reading race reports of 100 mile races. I’m skimming and moving on from the race reports by runners who talk about their PR’s and 8 minute paces for 100 miles and their place on the podium.
I’m not ‘casting shade’ on these runners, their abilities are awesome, no doubt about it. But there’s absolutely nothing relatable to their reports for me. I can barely hold a sub 9 minute pace for a 5K and it had better be cold and non-hilly that day.
No the race reports that resonate with me are the ones by the folks who worry about making the cut offs. The ones who push through enormous, soul shattering amounts of pain both mentally and physically to cross that finish line before the last seconds tick off. I read how they trip and fall, wrenching body and mind, their battles with darkness, hallucinations, nutrition, hydration and boredom. Their tales of everything that goes wrong, travel plans, forgetting to pick up their head lamps, trying new foods and really regretting it, but most of all the walls they have to break through to keep putting one foot in front of another make me try to figure out how, when, if this might be me one day.
And my association with Rabbit and her endeavors in this ridiculous sport we participate in and there’s an ear worm in my head that plays over and over, “You could do that. You can’t do that. You can do that. You can’t do that. You won’t know unless you try.” make me believe it might be possible one day.
Note I have my own walls to worry about in this regard, age, weight, training time and let’s face it sheer physical resources. But you know what? I’m pretty sure that if such a time comes that I let this flight of fancy take root and become a reality some day that Bunny and Rabbit will be encouraging me the whole way and I’m pretty sure one or both of them will be there force feeding me liquids and calories, making sure I don’t leave an aid station without everything I need to keep pushing forward.